Wednesday, September 05, 2007

Sports Psychology: Do You Crave Approval?

One big challenge for many athletes today is the fact that they worry so much about what others think when they perform that it becomes a huge distraction.

I must first say that it is important to care about other people. However it becomes unhealthy when athletes worry too much about what others think of them to the point that it distracts them from focusing on the task.

In my work, we call this social approval or acceptance. It causes athletes to look for status from their peers in the form of respect, admiration, popularity, or wanting to fit in or be liked. Many people in today's society crave these qualities.

When you worry too much about what others think, you can't focus on what is really important - your performance! In addition, this mindset also causes you to avoid mistakes or bad plays - not a good mindset to instill peak performance.

I once worked with a young female golfer who I will call Lisa. Lisa lacked confidence in her game and wanted me to help her play with more confidence.

As we talked, it became clear to me that Lisa relied on other people for her confidence. If her playing partners did not say, “Good shot” to her after she hit a good shot, she would begin to think negatively about herself.

Her brain went into overdrive, and she assumed that her playing partners really did not like her because they did not acknowledge when she hit a good shot. She would think to herself, “I guess she does not like me or maybe thinks I am a crummy player,” and
then proceed to lose confidence.

In addition, she was afraid of embarrassing herself when she played in tournaments. Her goal was to not shoot a bad number or high number for fear of what others would say to her about her game. More importantly, what would they think about her as a person?

A word of caution! Be careful of making statements such as, “If I am a bad golfer today, I guess I am not a worthy person.”

Let's face it, many athletes want respect from their peers. But at the very least, you have to let go of what others may or may not be thinking about you when you compete. To get your head in the game, focus on what is truly important during your performance!

In my next teleclass, “Everyone is Watching Me! How to Stop Worrying about What Others Think,“ I cover the techniques needed to stop worrying about what others think to create a focused and mentally tough mindset.

This seminar conducted via telephone helps you to understand social approval and how to perform better.

To take advantage of this satisfaction guaranteed offer and to gain access to my step-by-step mental toughness program visit: http://www.peaksportsnetwork.com/. You can demo several mental toughness programs I have at my online mental training website.


Thank You,

Patrick J. Cohn, Ph.D.,
Master Mental Game Coach

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2 Comments:

Blogger Helen said...

Nice BLog :)

1:57 AM  
Blogger Steven Imparl said...

Thanks for this blog entry. I had not really considered the possible importance of receiving others' approval as part of athletic performance. However, after reading what you have said about seeking approval, I am going to look for that behavior in myself.

I can see how it would be a distraction during practice or competition. Thanks.

3:22 AM  

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